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5 Dark Night Of The Soul Stages: Survive & Thrive

Emily
last updated on August 7, 2023
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The Dark Night of the Soul, a concept deeply ingrained in spiritual literature, is an intensely transformative phase that countless individuals have undergone since time immemorial. As humanity evolves and our collective consciousness elevates, more people are experiencing this profound phase in their spiritual journey. In this article, we’ll explore the five stages of this spiritual crisis, hoping to provide comfort, understanding, and guidance for those who might find themselves within its depths.


Table of Contents

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  • Five stages of the dark night of the soul
    • Stage 1: Denial
    • Stage 2: Anger
    • Stage 3: Bargaining
    • Stage 4: Depression
    • Stage 5: Acceptance
  • Recovering from the Dark Night of the Soul
  • Final thoughts

Five stages of the dark night of the soul

Stage 1: Denial

The journey through the Dark Night of the Soul often commences with denial. This stage is characterized by an initial resistance to the surging wave of negative emotions and distressing situations that mark the onset of this spiritual crisis. We attempt to disregard these issues or reassure ourselves that they’re temporary blips on the radar of life.

Negative Aspect & Coping: Denial can leave us stuck and unprepared for the coming stages of the Dark Night. The most effective strategy here is to acknowledge our feelings honestly and accept that we are entering a challenging phase of our spiritual journey.

Duration: The denial stage varies greatly from person to person, ranging from a few weeks to a couple of months.

However, as these emotions intensify, denial becomes an increasingly unsustainable strategy. The reality of our predicament begins to surface, pushing us to confront the brewing storm within, thus leading us to the next phase.

Stage 2: Anger

As denial dissolves, anger often takes its place. This anger might be directed at ourselves, others, or even the seemingly unjust circumstances of life. It’s not uncommon to feel as though we’ve been dealt an unfair hand, which can lead to frustration and resentment.

Negative Aspect & Coping: The anger stage can be destructive if not managed appropriately. Finding healthy outlets for anger such as physical exercise or artistic expression can be highly beneficial. Seeking therapy or counseling can also help navigate these turbulent emotions.

Duration: This stage could last for several months, depending on individual circumstances.

Yet, this anger is an integral part of the process, serving as our emotional response to the brewing internal storm. It’s an attempt to grapple with the emotional pain we’re experiencing, a sign that we’re beginning to face the reality of our situation.

Stage 3: Bargaining

The next stage in this transformative journey is bargaining. Here, we seek an escape from the emotional turmoil we’re enduring. We might negotiate with ourselves, others, or even a higher power, hoping to exchange promises of change or self-improvement for a swift resolution to our pain.

Negative Aspect & Coping: The bargaining stage often leads to self-blame or guilt. It’s important to realize that the Dark Night isn’t a ‘punishment,’ but rather a journey towards self-discovery and growth. Patience and self-compassion are key during this phase.

Duration: Bargaining can persist for a considerable period. For some, this phase can last from a few months to a year or more.

Regrettably, this phase rarely offers the relief we so desperately seek. The complex emotions that form the Dark Night of the Soul aren’t easily brushed aside or bargained with, leading us deeper into the crisis.

Stage 4: Depression

The fourth stage, depression, is when we truly confront the gravity of our situation. A profound sense of despair can set in, making us feel like we’re trapped in a bottomless pit of sadness. Things that used to spark joy might seem dull or pointless, leaving us adrift in a sea of hopelessness.

Negative Aspect & Coping: Depression can be isolating, and it’s crucial to seek professional help at this stage. Maintaining open lines of communication with trusted loved ones, and seeking help from therapists or counselors can provide immense relief.

Duration: This stage can be the longest and most challenging. It may extend over several months to a couple of years.

While it’s crucial to remember that this is a normal part of the process, seeking support from loved ones or professional help at this point can be highly beneficial. This stage calls for us to allow ourselves to feel these intense emotions, paving the way for healing and acceptance.

Stage 5: Acceptance

The final stage of the Dark Night of the Soul is acceptance. Here, we cease the struggle against our reality and start making peace with it. While we may not like our circumstances, we acknowledge them as part of our unique spiritual journey.

Negative Aspect & Coping: The challenge of the acceptance stage is to avoid rushing the healing process. True acceptance takes time, and it’s important to respect your own pacing and not force yourself to ‘move on’ too quickly.

Duration: Acceptance can also take a long time, but with it comes the beginning of healing and resurgence.

During this stage, we often start seeing our ordeal’s silver lining, discovering wisdom and lessons within the chaos. This is the most pivotal stage as it is the point where we begin to rebuild our lives, sparking a renewed sense of hope for the future.

Recovering from the Dark Night of the Soul

Emerging from the Dark Night of the Soul isn’t about a return to our old self, but rather, a rebirth into a more enlightened version of us. The light at the end of this dark tunnel is the dawn of a new consciousness, one that carries the wisdom gained through this challenging journey.

As you navigate your way through these stages, remember to treat yourself with kindness, seek support when needed, and trust in your journey. The Dark Night of the Soul is not a permanent state but a passage leading you towards profound spiritual growth and self-discovery. As spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle reminds us, “Sometimes surrender means giving up trying to understand and becoming comfortable with not knowing.”


Final thoughts

The Dark Night of the Soul, though an arduous journey, is a significant spiritual milestone, often signifying an imminent period of growth and transformation. It forces us to confront our deepest fears and insecurities, thereby clearing the way for profound self-discovery. Navigating through its five stages can be a daunting process, but remember: it is through enduring the darkest nights that we get to witness the most beautiful dawns. Each stage offers its unique challenges, but also invaluable lessons. Remain patient, seek help when needed, and trust in the journey.

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Emily

Emily is the founder, CEO, and writer for AglowLifestyle. A self-proclaimed "lifelong learner", Emily has combined her love of writing with her passion for spirituality to bring you the best articles on the law of attraction, manifestation, affirmations, and more. Emily has helped hundreds of individuals transform their lives through the power of manifestation. Her passion for spirituality and her love of writing have come together at AglowLifestyle, where she strives to provide the best articles on these topics.
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Emily Dyson

Founder and Writer

Hi, I'm Emily! I'm a spiritual seeker and self-proclaimed old soul. I work hard to bring you content that inspires, encourages, and guides you on your own journey of self-discovery.

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